How to Get a Girl to Like You - Here Are The Secrets You Have Been Desperately Looking For

By Pushpa Pal Singh

Women are attracted to certain traits in men which are rare to find according to several girls out there. These traits are not anything to do with what a person looks like or his financial condition but it's more related to a person's inner world than the outer world. You see you might have the stunning looks with a lot of money but girls are not looking for these things when it comes to long term relationships. They want much more than just money or looks. Read on to discover some of the most mind blowing secrets on how to get a girl to like you instantly...

Be proud of the way you are- Do you know that women can smell a loser from miles away? Most guys don't seem to have a sense of pride about themselves. No human being is perfect but this does not mean that you have to walk around with a loser like attitude which most guys out there carry. You see in order to really get a girl to like you, you need to act as if you are comfortable being the way you are and truly be proud of yourself even if you don't have anything special to offer.

Never try to please them- Do you know when you try the hardest to please a girl you are almost pushing her away? You see when a girl senses that you are trying hard she instantly knows that you want her attention and that very moment she starts playing too hard to get. Never try to please them rather try to act as if you don't even need there attention and you will get what you want from them.

Don't act according to their comfort- Some guys tend to have this strange habit of making the girl comfortable and trying to make her as comfortable as possible. You see when a girl witnesses that you are treating her like a queen she would instantly start giving you the slave treatment. Try to make her work for your attention instead of trying to make her comfortable in your company.

What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but men absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover some of the most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know- 9 Most Shocking Secrets Women don't want men to know

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Pushpa_Pal_Singh

Deadly Mistakes Men Make with Women - You Better Know These Before It's Too Late

By Pushpa Pal Singh

Some men get to date the hottest women out there while others just keep shooting in the dark or trying to get any girl possible out there. Why is it that some men have the power to choose when it comes to women while others keep trying or fail constantly with women? You see there is a large difference between the guys who get hot women and the guys who get no women at all. There are several deadly mistakes men make when it comes to women which spoils all their chances of scoring a date. Read on to discover what these mistakes are and how to avoid them...

Being too nervous around women- Do you know that nervousness is a sign of a low self esteem which eventually means low self confidence. You see confidence is one thing every woman demands and if a guy is low on self confidence women automatically assume that this guy is weak and maybe not even good enough.

Being obsessed with her- Now this is another mistake several men make with women. You see hot women are always stalked by several males out there but the problem is that such women can't stand men who are obsessed with them. You see when you want them the most that's the time when you push them away the most as well. Therefore try to control your emotions.

Being desperate and miserable- Desperation is a kind of a disease several men out there are suffering from and this is the reason why they never end up getting the kind of women they desire. You see desperation means not being good or worthy enough. You see when you are desperate women look at you as if you lack something in your personality due to which you are not getting the kind of women you desire and this is the reason why you will automatically become a guy girls cant stand.

What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but men absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover some of the most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know- 9 Most Shocking Secrets Women don't want men to know

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Pushpa_Pal_Singh

How to Attract & Create a Lasting Relationship With the Kind of Person You've Always Wanted

By Pushpa Pal Singh

How often do we complain in life that we never find the right person or the one we are looking for is already taken? You see the thing is that what you are looking for is right there but you are not looking hard enough. And at the same time when we do find the right person we are not able to maintain the relationship in the long term and than we start thinking about where we went wrong. Read on to discover some of the most stunning secrets on how to create a lasting relationship with the kind of person you have always wanted...

Learn to be a listener- To really create long lasting relationships you need to be a good listener. You see often when your partner isn't heard he or she starts feeling neglected and this is where the relationship truly suffers. Therefore it is extremely important to be a good listener at times and keep the opinions of your partner in mind.

Positivity is the key- Every person wants to be and remain positive. How would you like to be stuck with someone who is negative all the time and is complaining about one thing or the other all the time? This is the reason why you need to maintain a positive attitude throughout and avoid negativity at all costs.

Get rid of all insecure feelings- Insecurity is often the reason why most breakups and poor relationships. You see if you are insecure about yourself you will start acting possessive and would emotionally push your partner away. The best possible way to keep others happy in our company is to be comfortable with ourselves first.

What you don't know yet- Ever tried to wonder what's in a woman's mind? What is she thinking about? Do you know that women do not always mean what they say? They might say something and mean the exact opposite. But what do women actually want? Do you know there are some secrets women don't want men to know but men absolutely must know these secrets in order to succeed with women? Read on to discover some of the most "Shocking Secrets" women don't want men to know- 9 Most Shocking Secrets Women don't want men to know

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Pushpa_Pal_Singh

Passion & Purpose - Wisdom for Women

By Lorraine Platt

Many women long to connect deeply with a partner but have been unable to sustain a fulfilling relationship. They may be successful in other areas, but creating a lasting partnership remains elusive. What is it that keeps women from having what they really want?

There are many factors, as individual as the women themselves, but there is a common thread. The biggest obstacle to having intimacy with a partner is the unresolved hurt and betrayal of childhood wounding and the negative relational experiences that follow. Your relationship templates are created by your relationships with your primary caregivers. You may have left your parent's home decades ago, but your relational imprints remain until the edges are softened by new positive experiences.

Unfortunately, you may live out the same patterns, never giving yourself the chance to create new positive experiences. You may disempower yourself by believing that someone else is creating your painful experiences. So you shut down or change partners, hoping it will be different in the future or with someone else. But you are the same, and therefore, attract the same kind of man and create the same situation. Understandably, you may give up ever finding a man you can trust enough to help you heal this vicious cycle.

Your desire for connection tells you that you want a partner, but you feel too vulnerable to open to the possibility of being hurt again. The safety and control of being single or emotionally distant from your partner can keep you isolated even when you long to connect. If you have never had a trusting, fulfilling partnership, it is challenging to believe it is even possible.

Having never experienced the appreciation you needed to flourish, you protect the most beautiful, tender parts of yourself. With a half-open heart, you attract unavailable men who match your own ambivalence about being fully present. This reaffirms the belief that there aren't any "good" men out there, so you hold back even more. This absence of trust and openness creates more of the same. And so on... How can this self-destructive cycle be broken?

It requires faith and many baby steps to slowly build a solid foundation of trust. You can start by being willing to meet and get close to available men in the safest way possible - friendship. Perhaps spending time with a male friend or mentor you can trust will open up the door to eventually trusting a partner. You can start to have the experience of a man showing up for you in a meaningful way without being sexual. You can establish a friendship with a man who is honest, keeps his word, shows up on time and consistently invests himself in the relationship. This is an easier way to build trust and feel cared for without the intense feelings that can cause confusion in a romance. Perhaps it is a mentor who plays the role of a healing father figure who shows up in ways your father was unable to. Maybe you have a friend with a great husband and she can share her positive experiences with you and how she created such a great partnership.

There are conscious available men with strength and integrity and you attract them when you are available to yourself first. This means examining how you have closed your heart to protect yourself. It means giving yourself the love, attention, and validation you want from a partner and knowing you are complete. When your life is full, people love you, and there is no need for desperation, you become ready to invite a conscious loving man into your life. Be clear with yourself that no one else is allowed. If you're willing to settle, that's what you will get, a mediocre, immature man who can't show up, for whom you make excuses.

What do you really want? What have you always longed for? What would it take to believe in yourself and give yourself a chance? Now is the opportunity to be your own protective father and your own nurturing mother so you can set boundaries and care for yourself emotionally. Now is the time to give yourself what you've never received from anyone else - complete adoration, acceptance and compassion. Are you ready to really open up to a man and, if not, what would if take for you to become ready?

Many women believe they are ready and available but they are not in their bodies. Intellectually they understand relationships, they may even know what it takes to create a healthy one but they are cut off from their own experiences. Their breath is shallow, their bodies constricted and tense - no movement or flow is allowed because it would open the door to locked up pain that needs attention. And yet, this is the door to freedom - the freedom to experience both pleasure and pain, to be fully alive in your own body. You experience relationships on all levels: physical, spiritual, emotional and intellectual. All of these areas need attention and they need to be aligned with one another. If any area is neglected, it's impossible to be fully present. If you are not fully present, trusting another person can feel very precarious.

To trust someone is to surrender, to give up some measure of control. To give up some measure of control, you need to know it is safe and that you can trust yourself to see clearly and set appropriate boundaries. Seeing clearly requires being in touch with yourself. Setting appropriate boundaries requires feeling worthy enough to take care of yourself. Many women have been deeply disappointed by their fathers and other male role models throughout their lives. After being hurt so many times, they came believe they were unworthy of love. This painful conditioning caused them to repeat the pattern and pursue unavailable men who confirmed their negative beliefs.

What makes it possible to open to a healthy man is grieving the unhealthy ones, and letting them go. Experience your past disappointments and let your heart break open. Let your heart break open to a healthy man who wants to be there for you. Be there for yourself no matter how you feel and stop pretending that you're fine. Let down your guard and heal through the love of an accepting other who wants to know you completely. Stop giving yourself away in order to get love; there's nothing to earn or work for. Love itself will heal and expand who you are. In the light of love's healing, you will radiate beyond your pain and conditioning to be even more magnificent.

Staying connected to yourself and centered in a relationship is like a meditation - when your mind wanders, you just keep coming back. It's important to take it slow. Be discerning and get feedback from trusted friends or counselors who can see the situation objectively and give you a map for moving forward. You need the empty space of slowing down and tuning in to safely open up to someone. You need the room to feel your body and hear your intuition so you don't repeat the same destructive patterns. If your intuition is drowned out by sexual excitement, fantasies of the future, or fears from the past, then you won't hear or feel your own wisdom.

Decide to make room for a conscious man to enter your sacred space. This requires enormous trust to believe you can have this if you've never had it before. It means deeply valuing yourself and trusting that someone will really see and appreciate you. It means exposing yourself and trusting your own perceptions. It means setting boundaries with anyone who invades your space. It means worshipping yourself as the goddess that you are and attracting a man who will do the same.

The attractive women are the radiant open flowers with life beaming out of them. Smell, taste and feel life as you're moving through your day. Let the playful child and the powerful woman emerge to be seen and appreciated. Realize that a conscious man will be irresistibly drawn to your radiance if you just let it shine through. The men who are not ready for you will run away. You must set your own standards for how you will be treated - because you are wise and powerful, not because you are frightened and in control.

Believe it is possible. Know you are worthy and commit to letting it happen. Take the necessary risks to make yourself available to love. Heal your body and open your heart. Connect with other women who support you and rekindle your passion for life. Meet yourself and take a stand for who you are and what you want - then surrender to the magnificent mystery of how it will manifest. Appreciate what you already have and set your intention to expand it. How could ecstatic love NOT flow through such an open, receptive channel?

Lorraine Platt, LMFT

Lorraine Platt is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who supports women to create their ideal relationship. She draws from a variety of disciplines including breath and body-centered therapies. Her unique approach combines Buddhism, Breathwork, Focusing, and the work of David Deida. In addition to her Women's Groups, Couple and Individual sessions, she facilitates Single's Seminars with her husband Richard.

She can be reached at 415-302-1700 or lorraine@passionpurpose.org

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Lorraine_Platt

The One Benefit Of A Long Distance Relationship

By Jeff Lim

Did I mention that there is one benefit to having a long distance relationship? It puts money into the pockets of big airline corporations such as Virgin Atlantic, gas stations like Chevron and big phone companies like Verizon. They thank you very much for your business. Unfortunately for couples, there are no benefits for being in a long distance relationship. There is as enormous complexity of factors involved that make it difficult.

Let me tell you about the story of John and Jane. John lives in Los Angeles and Jane lives in New York. They both met at a party when Jane was in town on a business trip. The first problem that the two have is which one is the person that is going to be moving? Is either person willing to sacrifice their job or career for perhaps a lower pay or standard of living? What about leaving friends and family behind? If Jane is not moving to LA and John is not moving to New York, then why are they talking at all?

The second problem is that long distance relationships give a false sense of hope to one another. It may appear to raise each other's interest level, but in reality, it doesn't. It is the anticipation of meeting again that causes the interest to rise, creating a false sense of love. Any time your partner calls, you jump at the chance to talk. You never put her on hold or tell her that you're too busy with something else right now. Everything in your life gets put on hold to give her all of your attention.

The third problem that you have is that you can't bond if you're not around. There is a saying that "actions speak louder than words." You develop trust and comfort with that person when you are spending time together doing things. It allows you to see their personality, how the person reacts and how the person treats you. You can only judge a person's interest through their actions and body language which you obviously can't see in a LDR. Romance and love is by and large non-verbal, from the way you look at each other to the simple hugs given at the right moment when you need them. So what is the point of seeing each other every 3 or 6 months?

Problem number four is trying to make up for the distance by talking on the phone way too much. How does talking four or five times on a daily basis allow a relationship to build? Would you believe someone that is thousands of miles away who kept saying "I love you"! It's all talk and a phone call is definitely a poor substitute for a hug.

How about the 50 emails you send her everyday or the hours you spend instant messaging? What good does that do to building the relationship? But at the end, what do you really find out about that person? Did you go to their house? Did you see how she treats their parents or siblings? Maybe you did go to their place for a weekend. But yeah, you could have gone on a good day where she didn't treat her parents the way she usually does. Since you never see each other in normal day to day life, you lack the true knowledge of the other person and that is where the big problem lies.

The fifth problem is that it is a waste of money. Depending on where you are flying to and from, you can be spending thousands of dollars per year to see each other (and the false hope also). You may be going over your minutes and end up racking up $400 dollars per month phone bills. What about buying phone cards for international calls on a monthly basis? You may end up spending hundreds of dollars per year purchasing them. All this wasted money can be spent on building a relationship with someone who is close by.

Finally, It is a waste of time waiting for someone that is thousands of miles away. The fact is that no relationship, near of far, is 100% guaranteed. But the mere attempt at a long distance relationship increases the odds close to 100% that it is NOT going to work.

So what makes you think that your long distance love is going to be a hermit once he/she has committed to you? Most likely they won't be. They still have to go to work, go shopping, stop by the bank and go to the gym. Thus, they will be meeting others too, increasing the likelihood that they will meet someone that is better than you. If you are not there, then they have to fill that void with someone else. It's just the basic human need to be with others.

For John and Jane, their expectations of each other are skyrocketing even though they haven't seen each other in months. However, when they do get together as an exclusive couple, they would just end up at the start because they are really strangers to each other. The phone company AT&T almost had it right. Reach out but this time, don't touch someone.

Jeff is passionate about personal development topics and helping others find their true calling. More articles can be found at http://handylifeadvice.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Jeff_Lim

Live Together Successfully

By Bradlley Mckoy

Every relationship has its milestones - the first date, the first kiss, meeting the parents, and, of course, moving in together. The latter can be potentially overwhelming for those who have never lived with a partner before and have gotten so used to living independently, the way most singles are. The transition is particularly more difficult for men rather than women. If you're a woman about to go on the adventure of moving in with a man for the first time, you're in for a wild ride.

What To Expect

Just because a man suggested or agreed that you move in together doesn't mean that he's particularly happy or even sure about it. Man like being men, and though he might love you enough to want to share a life with you, there are still some things that he can't let go. Indeed, expect your man to have second thoughts and be quite difficult at some point. This is but natural.

What To Do

In order to make the transition of living together as smooth as possible for both you and your man, talk it over before you take the plunge. He might not be very keen to do so, but it's important that you have 'The Talk' so insist on it. Don't nag, however, or you'll find your man running the other way.

When you do have 'The Talk' listen to your man's expectations and make him listen to yours. Naturally, you will come across a few things that won't be acceptable to the other. In this case, you need to compromise. For example, your man might like to go out with his buddies on Wednesday nights for 'guy stuff'. Make it crystal clear that you won't tolerate cheating of any sort - or any wild behavior, for that matter. You might not be able to get him to follow a curfew, but you could agree on him calling you if he'll be late. Similarly, if your man doesn't like you spending hours on the computer every night, you can compromise to considerably cut down your Internet usage.

You have to make sure, however, that in the effort to compromise, you don't end up compromising yourself, your feelings, and your beliefs. This can be achieved with constant communication, transparency, and honesty - the very things that make a relationship work successfully.

What To Give

When moving in together, both parties need to be able to contribute something to make the relationship even more enjoyable and to make your life together as comfortable as possible. A contribution could be anything, really, as long as it's beneficial to both of you.

You can contribute household essentials such as furniture and decorations. Just make sure that it fits both of your tastes. You can divide chores equally among yourselves so no one feels taken advantage of. You can contribute to pay bills and other responsibilities.

Most of all, when moving in together, the best contributions you could give to each other are love, companionship, and loyalty. All these would make your life together as blissful as can be imagined.

Moving in with your man? Consider personalized gifts for men like Howard Miller clocks and cigar humidors to make your life together as enjoyable as possible. Visit ExecutiveGiftShoppe.com today.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Bradlley_Mckoy

Send Flowers To Show Them You Care

By Howard Brule

Sending flowers for different occasions is a wonderful way to express your feelings. You can send more formal arrangements for business associates or something more intimate to friends. Deciding to send flowers is the perfect way to say that you are thinking of someone and want to wish them happiness.

Sending flowers to your romantic interest is a great way to spark a new relationship. Your love interest will think you are very special for thinking of them. You can get an idea of the flowers that your love likes, or if there are any allergies, by seeking the advice of family and friends. Continue to send flowers as the relationship develops.

Many flowers have carried traditional meanings for centuries. Many people choose flowers based on the messages that they intend to send. Famously, red roses are a way to say "I love you." One red rose can send a message more effectively than a huge array of different flowers. Pink roses send the message that "I like you," if you're not yet willing to commit to red roses.

Flowers are appropriate to give to a performer or dancer after a musical or show, especially if the performer is a family member. Flowers will show that you enjoyed the performance and appreciate the effort. Sporting events are also a time to show your appreciation with flowers. Applause is fantastic but flowers will represent a longer lasting appreciation.

Meaningful life events are a wonderful time to send flowers. Birthdays are always a good choice and you can even send the number of flowers equal to the age of the person receiving the flowers. Anniversaries are also a good time to send flowers. Receiving the same type of flowers that your spouse sent to you for the very first time is so romantic! Another great time for sending flowers is for the birth of a child or a grandchild.

Sadder times also are a good time to express your sympathy and send flowers to offer cheer and comfort. When there is a death, flowers or a live plant celebrate life and respect those who have gone. For a person who is ill, flowers show that someone is thinking of you and pulling for your recovery. A great time to send them is after the funeral or after a person has been home from the hospital for awhile, after most of the floral gifts have ceased.

There are many other special occasions that are made brighter with the gift of flowers, such as graduations, a new home or a new job. Another great occasion is a personal visit when you bring flowers as part of your visit. In winter, when there are few flowers around, a floral offering can make any day a special one.

Locate florists across the U.S. or across town. Flower delivery by florists in thousands of towns. Take advantage of same day service. Online promotion

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Some Useful Tips You Can Use To Help You Find Mr / Ms Right

By Marvin Perry

Are you having a hard time finding a compatible person for a relationship? Are you unhappy because you have had little or no success. If yes, it may be time to take a different approach to dating.

If you have been consistently going to certain clubs / bars to meet people you probably know most of the people who go to these places. You need to find ways to expand your social circle.

You need to develop a plan which involves having a budget for your time and money. As you prepare yourself to commit to some new activities in your free time you should focus on activities you really enjoy doing, or activities you have always wanted to try.

Maybe you have always wanted to try kick-boxing, tennis, golf, or some other athletic activity. But you have never had anyone to do these activities with you, so you may not be interested in doing them alone.

You should make a list of specific activities which you have always wanted to try. Then you should start gathering information about local resources which will enable you to pursue those activities.

You can start by searching the internet, do a google search for local singles activities in, followed by the name of your city. For example local singles activities in New York City, you will have millions of choices to choose from. You can also search your local magazines and news papers for activities that take place at your local community centers.

You should make a list of local places which are available to you. Then you should find out about everything that is offered at these facilities. This can be a long list because there are many single people who are looking for new and exciting activities to participate in while having the ability to socialize with lots of local singles.

After you have decided which activities you would like to participate in you should check you schedule and your budget. The greatest benefit of taking part in these types of activities is that you are given the ability to meet singles who enjoy participating in the same types of activities that you do. This is a good basis for a wonderful relationship, because many couples today have absolutely nothing in common.

Marvin Perry is the founder of Athletic-Dating.com, Marvin is an avid athlete and he has always had a passion for physical fitness. It was Marvin's passion for physical fitness which motivated him to create the web site. http://athletic-dating.com/usa/new_york/new_york_online_dating.html

Article Source: http://www.ArticleBiz.com

Gifts for New Boyfriend Idea?

By Brian Connors

There just might be a guy in your life that you would like to spend more time alone with. You may also be thinking of a gift to get him to let him know that he is of special interest to you. Want to know a gifts for new boyfriend idea that can accomplish both objectives in a very entertaining way? The strategy is getting him a Movies Gift Basket. Let me explain.

One of the traditional ways of socializing with the opposite sex has been to spend time together watching a movie. These events typically occurred at a theater in which there was no privacy. You also had to possibly put up with annoyances regarding others in attendance who lacked proper etiquette. You were together but this situation had its drawbacks regarding being secluded from the attention of others.

This is when a Movie Gift Basket is needed. This strategic idea is packed with everything that makes a date together enjoyable. These treasures can contain movie theater treats such as popcorn, cookies, Cracker Jacks, peanuts, candy and even classic soda pop. The containers that hold everything can also be a pleasant surprise to the recipient as well. But what makes this gifts for new boyfriend idea so extra special?

The Movie Gift Basket can also include a $10 or $15 Blockbuster Gift Card that would hint of your wish to enjoy a film with him without the public invited. You could make a date to watch it together at your place or his without the distraction of strangers within a comfy environment. You would be able to enjoy both the movie and the sweet snacks together away from the stress and intrusion of unwanted crowds. It’s a scenario that may be a way for you to get to know his true self and personality as well.

So there you go. Take the advice of aGiftBasketParadise.com and make your move to get a relationship going in the right direction and enjoy a movie at the same time.

Brian is the owner of Gift Basket Paradise and wants to share a gifts for new boyfriend idea that may be what you are looking for. He invites you to visit his website at http://www.agiftbasketparadise.com/movie_gift_baskets.html for 4 very entertaining ideas to consider.

Article Source: http://www.ArticleBiz.com

Making the Most of the Dating Game - How to Stay Fresh Out There

By Megan Hazel

Why is it, when it comes to dating, men always seem to be winning the game? And yes, make no mistake, it is a game. So why can't women play right along with men? They can, as long as they don't let their female tendency to over-think get in the way!

Women can play as well as men, but they may have to play by the men's rules since they were the creators of the game. In other words, play the game right back at them! Have fun with the players! Why wait for a guy you are interested in to call you or not call you? Ask him for his number at the bar where you met him, and don't wait for him to ask for yours. In fact, don't even let him have yours, just ask him for his. Use it if you want to, but feel free and completely within your right to toss it on your nightstand and let it sit there for a few days too. If you do end up having a great conversation with a guy at the bar or at a party or other social event, don't feel the need to hang on his every word until he gets bored and decides to move on, only to come back to you at the end of the night to see if you'll leave with him. Do your own leaving!

Ok, so you're not the type to play these games and find then rather distasteful. Let's say you are ready, willing and able to jump headfirst into dating with no games whatsoever. Why, then, haven't you found the man of your dreams? You are attractive, witty, you have a great job and you are single. Perhaps you need to take a good look at your motives and re-think what's really important to you. Chances are you have been dating for longer than you would like to admit, and it may just be a matter of looking at your situation with fresh eyes. One thing to remember is not to sweat the small stuff. If you hate his shirt, who cares? So many women get hung up on trivial things like this. What if his ex-girlfriend told him it was the hottest shirt she has ever seen and you just happen to have a different opinion? For all you know, you could be wearing something that reminds him of his mother and you spent two hours getting as hot as you could get tonight preparing for your date. Even if he ends up truly being a bad dresser, this is something that can change over time or perhaps you can even learn to ignore it. There are more important things, which should come to light when you re-think why you are dating in the first place.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is another dating trap into which women fall and what I call the "He's The One" syndrome. Some women become so desperate for love that they convince themselves after very little time that the present guy of the moment is their One True Love. By romanticizing every little thing and making him into a larger-than-life character instead of recognizing his humanity, you do yourself a disservice. First, you fail to see this man for who he really is. This is a problem because in a few short months, when even more of his traits come to light, you may want to walk away from an otherwise great relationship because you have put him on a pedestal without his asking for it. Second, by making more of the relationship than it is too early, you may scare him away. Yes, men still do get scared. Even if he is very excited about the prospect of dating you, he is likely not ready for marriage after a month and neither should you be. In taking your time, hard as it may be, you will learn more and more about him. This is, in fact, the third reason to not fall prey to "He's The One" syndrome. Once you learn more about him, you may discover aspects that you truly dislike and this will help you to decide what you really do want in a man and be helpful later on in life when the next guy comes along. To the contrary, you may learn more about your current date and find new things to cherish all the time. By taking it slowly, you may discover the little nuances of his personality that you have missed if you had been rushing it and always trying to get to the 'next level' so to speak.

Men may think they have the market wrapped up when it comes to dating know-how, but there is no reason to perpetuate this myth. Women have just as much know how and should start to use it!

Megan Hazel is a freelance writer who writes about relationship advice and dating topics, similar to what consumers read in Women's Day

Article Source: http://www.ArticleBiz.com

It Is Better To Let Your Love Be Blind

By Jacob Gan

"Is love really blind?" I wonder. Having been happily married (and some of the times not so happily) for 30 years, I cannot help but ask myself more frequently whether my love is blind. Unsurprisingly to myself, the answer seems to be affirmative. How else would I have been able to go through the various difficult times in our relationship? Logic would dictate that we would have broken up by now. The next question I have been asking is whether it had been good that my love is blind.

I found an interesting section in the book "An Introduction to Positive Psychology" by WC Compton with the title "Is Love Really Blind?". What you will find in the rest of the article is based on what Compton wrote together with my thoughts.

In our minds, very often, we have pictures of our partners that are inaccurate. We have what is called "positive romantic illusions" about our partners. These illusions explain why we are oblivious to the faults of our partners and so enamoured of them.

While it is true that these illusions tend to fade with time, it is also true they can also strengthen with times, albeit with different characteristics.

In the former, when marital problems surface, and if the illusions disappear completely, it might lead to eventual marital breakup. Fortunately, most of the times, the illusions might weaken but do not disappear completely. The remnant illusions might help to weather the storms in the relationships.

In the latter case, the marriage might stay strong even though there may be many situations and incidents that might wreck a weaker relationship. We might even increase our willingness to accept many apparent faults and mistakes, and even idiosyncrasies, of our partners. Let us examine why this happens.

It has been found that couples who idealized their partner’s attributes, or had exaggerated beliefs about their control over the relationship, or were overly optimistic about the future of their relationship, were happier. Their relationships were also more stable and lasted longer.

These observations lead me to draw the following inferences/conclusions:

It is through the positive romantic illusions about our partners that explain why we choose our partners and not someone else. The positive romantic illusions about our partner help us to stick to our partner even during bad times and under otherwise unfavourable conditions. We might continue to deliberately keep a biased positive view of our partner so as to maintain, or even enhance, the relationship. There is mutual enhancement of the positive romantic illusions that partners have for each other. People are more committed to spouses who see them in positive light.

However, should the stress present in the couple’s life lead to strains in the relationship, the positive romantic illusions might begin to fall apart, leading each partner to realize they have been fooling themselves about the qualities of their partners. Without the presence of the positive romantic illusions, the relationship can then deteriorate very rapidly.

Overall then, it is good for couples to maintain the positive romantic illusions they have. This way, they will remain ‘in love’ and continue to experience all the joys of romantic love.

Reference: succezz.com, jacobgan.com, jacoblearning.com

Jacob Gan PhD (Michigan) has more than 20 years of teaching experience in a university and 8 years of business/industrial experience after graduation. He writes for succezz.com, JacobGan.com, JacobEducation.com, DemystifyCancer.com, understanding-orchids.com, motivate2success.com and JacobLearning.com. He hosts Jacob.TheeLearningcentre.com, an elearning portal

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50th Wedding Anniversary Planning

By Suz Daykin

50th wedding anniversary planning can be a bit stressful! 50 years of making friends and family can mean that there would be lots of people to invite and the expectation of a great party as well as a big mixture of ages can add to the pressure. Not that I am trying to put you off! If you plan your anniversary party then there will be no need to panic.

You first need to think about the type of party that your golden couple would enjoy. My aunt and uncle had a big party, organised as a wedding, complete with dancing but my grandparents enjoyed a family meal at one of their favourite restaurants. Which would they enjoy?

When you have worked out if you are inviting everyone or just family you will have a rough idea of numbers. You will now need to find the venue! Look at local hotels and function facilities, get menu samples, bar prices and if not included, the room hire. Also ask around, a local community hall could be just what you are looking for in space and also facilities. A number of community centres have their own kitchen and just ask that you clear up afterwards. This could save you a fortune. If the couple are members of a local social club or golf club they may have membership discounts to hire the room, plus this is a venue known to them and the service would be great, you may even get a few extras.

When you are looking around any of the possible venues think about the size of the room - is everyone going to be seated at tables. The location - is it easy to find for your guests that are travelling, is there overnight accommodation if needed? And the decor - would you need to spend lots to make the room look nice?

When you have all the information, the next stage in your 50th wedding anniversary planning is to collate all of the facts; prices, sizes, ease, minimum numbers etc. We find the best way to do this is to have all of the information on a spreadsheet so that you can compare apples with apples. When you have made your decision you will need pay a deposit to the venue to secure the date, and make sure you read the contract!

Now that the venue is booked you will need to organise invitations and possibly accommodation. It would be a good idea to contact local hotels for prices so that you could include a list of possible places that your guests could stay in the invitation. Don't get involved in booking accommodation, let your guests do that otherwise you may find that this will take up most of your time. Get your guests to reply with any special dietary requirements

Discuss catering with the venue or with the caterer when you have your replies so that they have all the details of children's meals or special needs. You will need to confirm numbers a couple of weeks before the party - check with your venue as to what is best.

Organise any decor - it could be flowers, balloons, candles and either book with the decor company or get your volunteers ready! You may want to get into the venue the night before to get everything in place. Make sure your venue knows this as they may have another function on.

If you want to have a special 50th anniversary cake then you will need to book this with a baker in advance, some people have replicas of their wedding cake or the wedding cake they always wanted, others will have fun cakes that show off their personality.

Venue booked, invitations sent and received back, numbers confirmed, decorations done, cake ready at bakers, all that is left is to have a great 50th anniversary party!

Suz Daykin is the Editor of Anniversary Gifts By Year, the complete guide for anniversary gift ideas and how to organise great anniversary parties.

More 50th Anniversary Ideas Here

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Cross-Cultural Personal Relationships

By Duane Beadle

Marrying even within your own culture can be a challenging experience. Once you get past the wedding day and the romance you are left with the everyday task of loving somebody who is not like you. Differences can be a source of inspiration or conflict. But what are the challenges of marry into another culture?

A desire to understand another’s culture will not prevent conflict. You have your own cultural beliefs that you bring to a relationship and you will in the first instance use that framework to judge a person or situation. However it is important to gather as much information about your partner’s culture as you can. For example their rituals, their religious beliefs, the role of extended family in your partner’s life and how much autonomy does your partner have in making decisions for their life. People in the West have a great deal of independence from their extended families. Those in the East value close family relationships. This will impact on your relationship.

Do not assume your partner is going to change with gentle persuasion from you. This is probably a mistake people make generally in relationships. People need to be accepted for themselves and if you need to change somebody to ensure you can have a relationship with them, it begs the question why choose the person in the first place. That’s not to say that change will not occur as you spend more time getting to know someone and what they want in the relationship. Trying to change someone’s cultural tendencies will create more unnecessary conflict.

There are many situations that arise in life that call for us to draw on ‘common-sense’ ways to deal with them. That common-sense is made up of our past experience, our habits, our value systems and our taken for granted ways of how to react to things that happen in our life even small things. Remember you and your partner do not possess the same common-sense view of the world. In some situations like how to eat food correctly or what to do in a temple, choosing the ‘when in Rome’ approach can save a lot of unnecessary conflict. But there are some things that are not so easy to solve by using this approach especially if they call into question fundamental values and beliefs. Again just because you choose to live in your partner’s country does not mean you have to compromise who you are.

The answer to all of the above conundrums and potential areas of conflict is to communicate. Be prepared to talk about issues in your relationship particularly in the `getting to know you stage`. Then make a commitment to communicate throughout your relationship. Never make assumptions, particularly in a cross-cultural relationship.

Discuss issues like how much free time is normal in a relationship. Discuss your finances and whether both of you are going to work. How will you raise children? Where are you going to live and will there be the enough job opportunities for whoever is going to work. Communication is the secret to avoiding unnecessary conflict and to resolving conflict should it arise. Some cultures are more adept at direct communication than others. Nevertheless without some degree of commitment to discussing issues being made, your chances of a successful relationship become less and less.

One practical way a couple can find out if they want to enter into a cross-cultural marriage is for either partner to seek a fiancée visa. A period of time in your partner’s country will allow you the space to really get to know your partner and their culture and will provide sufficient information for you to choose whether you want to marry your partner. Bringing your partner from the Philippines on a fiancée visa to the USA? Check out the relevant websites for information on the completion of the K1 visa application form.

Duane J. Beadle is an expert on Fiancée Visas. For more information on K1 fiancée visa process for the Philippines and K1 visa preparation, please visit Filipina Fiancée Visa com: "Bringing Your Bride to Your Side!"

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